To Anne, who is a singer. She suffered a stroke and for awhile couldn't sing.
I recognised her immediately through her listening. We eventually sang together, old songs she'd sung on Elcho Island, her home. She was my mother, my lullaby, the knee on which my head rested. Anne came to me in visions when I felt my loneliest.
Ally, another 60 year old with a need to sing and express herself creatively and who, when she doesn't, like me is attacked by the Black Dog who lets us only see the vicious underbelly of the human species. (Biting could be therapeutic?)
To Mitch and coffee dates and breathless outpourings of our hurts and frustrations, naughtiness and anticipations. Words shared to calm the other and reinforce in ourselves we are strong women, leaders, elders in the making.
To Tania, beautiful woman who showed me I am beautiful too. How I long to wrap my song in your flute tunes and dance a dance so magical it will show me the way to home.
Paula, another passionate Aries, living authentically. Your wisdom did not go unnoticed Paula. I loved you're storytelling. When you spoke of the communities you visited I felt like I walked with you on their land. Those stories leave a longing to immerse myself in the very ground you traversed. To know the spirit of the people. I feel Mother Earth rising up within, yes, yes, yes.
So many beautiful people who embraced me and made the Northern Territory a friendly place for me.
Here in Sydney I have been stifling my creative voice. Yes I sing and I perform and do theatre yet I want more. I want to be working with others, facilitating their release of their creative energy, sharing the learning and the knowledge that I carry.
Like the knowledge that its ok to be a snake and spit
There's power in howling like a banshee
The quiet cave within can be a resting zone
As fish swim so will we cry
And I want to be my authentic self, shining in my magnificence, refusing to accept that there can be barriers to the life I want for myself. Excuses, a friend recently said to me. Of course I huffed it off. The arrogance of the young I was thinking. I'm glad I got over that huffy bit and saw his wisdom.
The excuses and obstacles I've put in my own way have been weighing me down so once again I'm calling on snake energy to slough off the old skin.
I slip from release into planning, and I see myself as a project that needs project management.
First step, a title, develop a timetable, small achievable goals are the key, don't leave the first milestone too far away, focus.
And in doing, I'm beyond the prison of depression.
