Monday, August 10, 2020
Sunday, August 18, 2019
My Country's Shame
I was at a conference in July and a woman from New Zealand was running a session on letting go of Shame. I carry so much shame and images immediately came to mind, yet I did not go to the session. I was afraid of exposing the depth of my shame.
My shame that an Australian gunned down 50 people praying in Christchurch. People who had been welcomed into New Zealand whereas Australia has turned its back on their ilk. It's not enough that people be punished for having to flee their homes, their families, their countries, someone from this country that is so lacking in compassion, goes to kill them. I am deeply ashamed.
I am ashamed that an Australian broadcaster feels its his right to downgrade a leader from a neighbouring country because she's a woman. I'm not surprised by his behaviour. He did this to Julia Gillard, a Prime Minister who was considered a brilliant diplomat, an impressive leader and a positive example of the value of equality by leaders of other Commonwealth countries. And this was told to me by a couple of CHOGM delegates from Mozambique who I was chatting with on a train in Perth. They were very impressed by Julia yet in her own country the likes of Alan Jones and Tony Abbot were intent on building hatred towards her. Now Alan Jones has turned his attention to another confident, dignified female prime minister.
I feel shamed by the level of misogyny that continually tries to downplay the effectiveness of women in public life and tries to usher us back into our role of mothering our children and husbands.
I am shamed by the treatment of asylum seekers by successive governments. As well as being ashamed, I am scared by the current leaders of the government who have allowed their personal hatred and racism to inform their behaviour which is embarrassing the Australian public.
Are are they happy to admit that Australian's are still just a bunch of racist rednecks who have learned nothing from our time on this planet?
Are you happy to allow them to portray that image of the Australian community?
I'm not prepared to admit that we are all coal loving, profit seeking, kill anything that moves and even things that don't, difference hating hillbillies!
That is not the Australia I have been working towards since I was 15.
The Australia we are seeing is an Australia caught up in intolerance, greed, control and FEAR.
I have to ask WHAT IS THE THREAT?
Why do Scomo and Dutton fear Displaced People?
Why do they fear First Nations people?
Do they actually see anyone outside of themselves?
Why can't they see that compassion is a respected virtue?
How can they not see their own hypocrisy?
How can they claim to represent Christians?
How can they think they are fit to govern?
I think they need some reflective practice training.
And some deep listening skills training.
And some mindful compassion training.
And some bible training.
Some Unconscious Bias training as well.
While the Australian government continues to operate without respect, I will feel the shame of my country.
I will also feel anger, the anger that fuels action and I will speak out and say this is NOT OKAY.
My shame that an Australian gunned down 50 people praying in Christchurch. People who had been welcomed into New Zealand whereas Australia has turned its back on their ilk. It's not enough that people be punished for having to flee their homes, their families, their countries, someone from this country that is so lacking in compassion, goes to kill them. I am deeply ashamed.
I am ashamed that an Australian broadcaster feels its his right to downgrade a leader from a neighbouring country because she's a woman. I'm not surprised by his behaviour. He did this to Julia Gillard, a Prime Minister who was considered a brilliant diplomat, an impressive leader and a positive example of the value of equality by leaders of other Commonwealth countries. And this was told to me by a couple of CHOGM delegates from Mozambique who I was chatting with on a train in Perth. They were very impressed by Julia yet in her own country the likes of Alan Jones and Tony Abbot were intent on building hatred towards her. Now Alan Jones has turned his attention to another confident, dignified female prime minister.
I feel shamed by the level of misogyny that continually tries to downplay the effectiveness of women in public life and tries to usher us back into our role of mothering our children and husbands.
I am shamed by the treatment of asylum seekers by successive governments. As well as being ashamed, I am scared by the current leaders of the government who have allowed their personal hatred and racism to inform their behaviour which is embarrassing the Australian public.
Are are they happy to admit that Australian's are still just a bunch of racist rednecks who have learned nothing from our time on this planet?
Are you happy to allow them to portray that image of the Australian community?
I'm not prepared to admit that we are all coal loving, profit seeking, kill anything that moves and even things that don't, difference hating hillbillies!
That is not the Australia I have been working towards since I was 15.
The Australia we are seeing is an Australia caught up in intolerance, greed, control and FEAR.
I have to ask WHAT IS THE THREAT?
Why do Scomo and Dutton fear Displaced People?
Why do they fear First Nations people?
Do they actually see anyone outside of themselves?
Why can't they see that compassion is a respected virtue?
How can they not see their own hypocrisy?
How can they claim to represent Christians?
How can they think they are fit to govern?
I think they need some reflective practice training.
And some deep listening skills training.
And some mindful compassion training.
And some bible training.
Some Unconscious Bias training as well.
While the Australian government continues to operate without respect, I will feel the shame of my country.
I will also feel anger, the anger that fuels action and I will speak out and say this is NOT OKAY.
Friday, January 25, 2019
Dying from lack of creative expression - an exploration of depression
It's been a long time since I posted here. Leaving Darwin has been harder than I thought. I'm called to the people I left behind.
To Anne, who is a singer. She suffered a stroke and for awhile couldn't sing.
I recognised her immediately through her listening. We eventually sang together, old songs she'd sung on Elcho Island, her home. She was my mother, my lullaby, the knee on which my head rested. Anne came to me in visions when I felt my loneliest.
Ally, another 60 year old with a need to sing and express herself creatively and who, when she doesn't, like me is attacked by the Black Dog who lets us only see the vicious underbelly of the human species. (Biting could be therapeutic?)
To Mitch and coffee dates and breathless outpourings of our hurts and frustrations, naughtiness and anticipations. Words shared to calm the other and reinforce in ourselves we are strong women, leaders, elders in the making.
To Tania, beautiful woman who showed me I am beautiful too. How I long to wrap my song in your flute tunes and dance a dance so magical it will show me the way to home.
Paula, another passionate Aries, living authentically. Your wisdom did not go unnoticed Paula. I loved you're storytelling. When you spoke of the communities you visited I felt like I walked with you on their land. Those stories leave a longing to immerse myself in the very ground you traversed. To know the spirit of the people. I feel Mother Earth rising up within, yes, yes, yes.
So many beautiful people who embraced me and made the Northern Territory a friendly place for me.
Here in Sydney I have been stifling my creative voice. Yes I sing and I perform and do theatre yet I want more. I want to be working with others, facilitating their release of their creative energy, sharing the learning and the knowledge that I carry.
Like the knowledge that its ok to be a snake and spit
There's power in howling like a banshee
The quiet cave within can be a resting zone
As fish swim so will we cry
And I want to be my authentic self, shining in my magnificence, refusing to accept that there can be barriers to the life I want for myself. Excuses, a friend recently said to me. Of course I huffed it off. The arrogance of the young I was thinking. I'm glad I got over that huffy bit and saw his wisdom.
The excuses and obstacles I've put in my own way have been weighing me down so once again I'm calling on snake energy to slough off the old skin.
I slip from release into planning, and I see myself as a project that needs project management.
First step, a title, develop a timetable, small achievable goals are the key, don't leave the first milestone too far away, focus.
And in doing, I'm beyond the prison of depression.
To Anne, who is a singer. She suffered a stroke and for awhile couldn't sing.
I recognised her immediately through her listening. We eventually sang together, old songs she'd sung on Elcho Island, her home. She was my mother, my lullaby, the knee on which my head rested. Anne came to me in visions when I felt my loneliest.
Ally, another 60 year old with a need to sing and express herself creatively and who, when she doesn't, like me is attacked by the Black Dog who lets us only see the vicious underbelly of the human species. (Biting could be therapeutic?)
To Mitch and coffee dates and breathless outpourings of our hurts and frustrations, naughtiness and anticipations. Words shared to calm the other and reinforce in ourselves we are strong women, leaders, elders in the making.
To Tania, beautiful woman who showed me I am beautiful too. How I long to wrap my song in your flute tunes and dance a dance so magical it will show me the way to home.
Paula, another passionate Aries, living authentically. Your wisdom did not go unnoticed Paula. I loved you're storytelling. When you spoke of the communities you visited I felt like I walked with you on their land. Those stories leave a longing to immerse myself in the very ground you traversed. To know the spirit of the people. I feel Mother Earth rising up within, yes, yes, yes.
So many beautiful people who embraced me and made the Northern Territory a friendly place for me.
Here in Sydney I have been stifling my creative voice. Yes I sing and I perform and do theatre yet I want more. I want to be working with others, facilitating their release of their creative energy, sharing the learning and the knowledge that I carry.
Like the knowledge that its ok to be a snake and spit
There's power in howling like a banshee
The quiet cave within can be a resting zone
As fish swim so will we cry
And I want to be my authentic self, shining in my magnificence, refusing to accept that there can be barriers to the life I want for myself. Excuses, a friend recently said to me. Of course I huffed it off. The arrogance of the young I was thinking. I'm glad I got over that huffy bit and saw his wisdom.
The excuses and obstacles I've put in my own way have been weighing me down so once again I'm calling on snake energy to slough off the old skin.
I slip from release into planning, and I see myself as a project that needs project management.
First step, a title, develop a timetable, small achievable goals are the key, don't leave the first milestone too far away, focus.
And in doing, I'm beyond the prison of depression.
Monday, January 30, 2017
Living in politically sensitive times
I was thinking about the song Mama won’t allow no banjo
picking round here and I thought what about what papa won’t allow, thinking
of papa trump, papa putin, papa turnbull and then I thought “actually I would
prefer not to think about them and their androcratic behaviour.”
So I got to thinking of the song again and how I am a mama
and I believe there are more important things not to allow. I encourage banjo and guitar picking. Music is good
for you
I decided to play the song and as I was singing this other song emerged,
We won’t fade away, no we won't. This song
evolved out of remembering Pat Humphries’ Keep on walking Forward.
After a couple of days playing with the songs, I found the final
arrangement.
So here’s what this mama and feminist won’t allow.
Mama won’t
allow no racism round here
Mama won’t allow no racism round here
Mama won’t
allow no racism, get your head out of that schism
Mama won’t
allow no racism round here
We won’t fade away no we won’t
We won’t fade away no we won’t
We won’t fade away, we’ve fought for our rights and we’ll have our say
We won’t fade away no we won’tMama won’t allow no misogyny round here
Mama won’t
allow no misogyny round here
Mama won’t
allow no misogyny, hating women seems strange to me
Mama won’t
allow no misogyny round here
We won’t lose our voices no we won’t
We won’t lose our voices no we won’t
We won’t lose our voices about women’s right to make their own choices
We won’t lose our voices no we won’tMama won’t allow no domestic violence round here
Mama won’t
allow no domestic violence round here
Mama won’t
allow no domestic violence, and she encourages women to break their silence
Mama won’t
allow no domestic violence round here
We won’t be
silenced no we won’t
We won’t be
silenced no we won’t
We won’t be
silenced about wanting a world that’s free of violence
We won’t be
silenced no we won’t.
Mama won’t
allow no child abuse round here
Mama won’t
allow no child abuse around here
Mama won’t
allow no child abuse, we all know there is no excuse
Mama won’t
allow no child abuse round here
We won’t
fade away no we won’t
We won’t
fade away no we won’t
We won’t
fade away, we’ve been here from the start and we’re here to stay
We won’t
fade away no we won’t
Thursday, September 1, 2016
KNOWING GRACE:
I found a song on my Zoom recorder today while listening to the songs I created while my son David was here. It was a song about grace. It came to me just after my last post, Are you proud to be Australian? The horror of Don Dale rattled me. I thought of my own sons and how they were in their youth and I saw how easily it could have been them behind bars. Johnny Farnham sang "we're all someone's daughters, we're all someone's sons". That is truth and I as parent and grandparent and a citizen of this country, never want to see young people being treated in that way again.
I met with some friends down in the Botanic Gardens to create a song that would express how we felt and drive action for change. Ally Mills and Ian and Katy, her children were there and 2 of her grandchildren. Margie Egan brought her drum, and Kevin McArthy came with his guitar, though I can't remember if he got out his guitar. We mucked around a bit with a song. Is there still action around Don Dale I wonder?
The song has been removed from Soundcloud so I can't share it with you. Instead I will question what you perceive, experience, believe is Grace.
Practice seeing wisdom, truth and grace in the faces around you.
What is grace to me?
The ability to show love and compassion despite own suffering. The power to re-frame, transmute and transform suffering. To be who you are.
I found a song on my Zoom recorder today while listening to the songs I created while my son David was here. It was a song about grace. It came to me just after my last post, Are you proud to be Australian? The horror of Don Dale rattled me. I thought of my own sons and how they were in their youth and I saw how easily it could have been them behind bars. Johnny Farnham sang "we're all someone's daughters, we're all someone's sons". That is truth and I as parent and grandparent and a citizen of this country, never want to see young people being treated in that way again.
I met with some friends down in the Botanic Gardens to create a song that would express how we felt and drive action for change. Ally Mills and Ian and Katy, her children were there and 2 of her grandchildren. Margie Egan brought her drum, and Kevin McArthy came with his guitar, though I can't remember if he got out his guitar. We mucked around a bit with a song. Is there still action around Don Dale I wonder?
The song has been removed from Soundcloud so I can't share it with you. Instead I will question what you perceive, experience, believe is Grace.
Practice seeing wisdom, truth and grace in the faces around you.
What is grace to me?
The ability to show love and compassion despite own suffering. The power to re-frame, transmute and transform suffering. To be who you are.
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